My parents have been very irritating these days. Shit like this happen when you get 0rank points. Can't stand the nagging from my parents. Dad" why are you still playing this game.. It is getting you all the red marks" Like Fk! Even type it out here makes me mad. I know what I'm doing and I know when to freaking take a break man! I'm old enough. My mom just switched my econs tutor. She has this, according to me, traditional mindset that only with tuition, will one do well. This new tutor claims to teach in a private school and blah blah blah. It is also more expansive than my previous tutor. I don't give a flying fk who you are man. I still stand by my claim that I can do this without the help of tuitions (particularly for econs). Yea.. its for my own good and stuff. I can't blame my parents for being worried for me, but the thought of it just sends waves of anger through my body. I'm not sure why am I so angry with small issues like this. I'm really unsure and losing control of both my body and mind. I get irritated by small comments made by friends too. A'lvl is screwing me over. All these would not have happened if I had scored better for my exams, but it is not that I'm slacking. I'm trying my best, but somehow I failed every single subject for mids. It just goes to show that man's ability is limited. I've gotta have faith that God will bring me through this. But for now, I just wanna be alone. Don't comment about what I do cause I even I'm unsure and confused. Man.. can't believe I'm so easily irritated nowadays. It is an uncomfortable feeling within. A'level will freaking mind fk you. You just gotta pray for the strength and God's grace to carry you through this trial and emerge a winner.

It has been a long time since I last logged in here. Well.. life is going on well and fine..... NOTTTT!!! Lots of crappy things happen because of bad results. My life seems to revolve around my results, and it is definitely true. I've reached rock bottom where I've got 2.5 pts for common test and just when I thought that it could not be any worst, I end up getting a big fat ZERO for mids. I was initially freaking disappointed with my results but somehow I don't feel as stressed as I have expected myself to be. I am actually quite relax and just studying as per normal. I don't know. Is it because of the increased faith in God? It is because I am complacent after seeing that my previous classmates have performed very well for their A's? Or maybe because I've been lying to myself that the the markers from my school are too strict and that A'lvl examiners are much kinder with the marks allocation? Whatever it is, this lack of urgency is killing me. Trying to make myself do extra and regain that sense of urgency, but it isn't easy. Confused. Exams never fail to screw with your mind, Especially A'levels.

A day of ups and downs

Hey people.. this christmas period is a super busy period for me man.. It is definitely not due to studies but somehow activities keep pouring in!! I have not even finished my mountain of holiday homework!! Prepared to listen to teacher's 'music' when I go back to school..
Anyway, talking about today.. Had a super fun time with the elderly from HCA hospice! We were supposed to be shopping with our partner(a patient) for things at Giant(tamp). At first I was like.. what?! shopping?! sian leh.. no meaning.. But I was paired up with Mr Wong hong jee. At first glance, he looked like the most sickly and 'dao' of them all but things changed while we were shopping. We hit off on a right note and I even talked him into buying frog leg and stuff to try since he haven tried it before.. He is a super nice guy and was constantly asking me to bring him to the chocolate section to buy chocolates... I thought it was like his rare moments out shopping and wanted to buy them for his own consumption.. I totally did not think that he would be buying them for his grandchildren which really touched me! Everything that he bought was for his family and not for himself.. In the end, we bought like 61bucks worth of things and he paid $31 cos we were only given 30bucks by HCA to spend.. We even talked about his job and all in the past.. At the end, he was damn funny when he wanted to offer me 5bucks for my company.. L0L Of course I rejected but I'm just glad that my efforts to try and make him happy is recognized=) I always thought that people with terminal illness would be like sickly and sad. But after seeing them for them today, I realised that they were actually a very happy and positive bunch of people! Idk why I am so emotionally moved by these people.. Maybe its because of their strength in facing their illness? Or maybe I wished my grandfather would be as happy as them on his last journey and I could have done more for him?? Nevertheless, I would be looking forward to the chance to interact with the patients from hospice care very soon, learn from them the positive attitude to life and also get a chance to visit Mr Wong. You guys should volunteer your time and give back to the community as well.. It would be an experience that you can learn from I promise you=)

Really Hate people who say that I flirt just because I talk to the opposite sex! Stupid people! Please.. there is such thing called friends! Its unfortunate that you people don't see me talking to guys cause I really think that I hang out with more guys than girls.. so too bad.. suck it up man! Appreciate that people can tell me in my face instead of speaking behind my back but please have an open mind.. As for some others, It is kindof obvious that I dun really like you.. so really.. dun give me a reason to kidnap you and send you on a free VIP ride to North Korea! haha

Anyway, there are SO many holiday hw lah! JC is totally from sec sch man! The Homework is not even essay at all!! Hello! Funfair ah?? Give so many hw.. I need my break you know! A'lvl is going to be over VERY SOON! Damn.. that means that It will be my turn already... Don't even know if I'm prepared for it! haizzz..

On a brighter note, I'm 18!!!! Car license is now my main target to achieve.. Best to get it Asap! It'll be cool to drive to school to take my A'lvl=D

A Man's Wealth May Become a curse to his son but a son's wisdom is a blessing to his father

Hi! oh man!! I just realized that I promised to update this right after my promos ended.. Oops.. Lucky not many ppl read this blog=)
Anyway, it has been long and I got back my promo marks.. 52 points. Not very good but at least I promoted and have another year to prove my worth!=D A-level is almost going to be over too! How time flies man!!! I don't need to have superpower of speed of light to quicken the pace of the already speeding time! Soon will be my turn.. and my JC experience would end soon after=( Oh before I forget, good luck to those taking A-lvl!!=)

I'll let you taste your own words when that moment arrives and you gotta swallow them back...

Hi! It has been quite a LONG time since I last posted here.. Thought that I just post something here before the start of my 2nd Promos... Life has been great!(I'm lying). Haiz.. Noticed I've been complaining about school life for most of my post.. hmm...

Anyway, I just found out recently that some people are betting against me promoting and are worried about me being blur and may not promote! This feeling really sucks when you hear all that. I'm in some kind of student of concern list (results bad, in danger of not promoting kind) as well as teachers have been talking about me among themselves. I really really don't know what is wrong with me!! Personally I feel that I've been average in terms of studying (but I've definitely not slacked) and I'm just 2 points from promotion. It therefore sucks to hear that people are worried about you cos I really wanna know what about me is not good enough to promote??? cos I'm blur? In what way?? I don't wanna sound like I hate myself and all.. but its time to face the truth. If I can't do well given the work that I put in(which I think is more than what I put in for my 0's), I think the only reason for that (although I've tried very hard to deny it) is that I'm not as clever. Another word for stupid.

But everything has a reason for happening. I thought it through today and realised God helped me! I know that I've been losing it these few days having to stay back in school till like 9 but not covering as much as I should/need to. I really thank my Lord for bringing me back down to earth! Don't get me wrong.. I'm not being religious and all just cause my promos is nearing.. I really felt that way!=)
Anyway, promos is like 2 days away. Can't wait for promos to end!! But in order for post-promos activities to be enjoyed, I must study SUPER hard now and freaking PROMOTE!!! Good Luck anyone who is reading this now and are preparing for promos. Never give up!=)

~Latest: My mom apparently went for some poly talk and found out some business course for me..seriously man.. Even she has no faith in me?! She said wanted to go to SP to take a look and check the surrounding and e course was for herself.. Although I may not be clever, but do I look that dumb?? Comeon man! Now I finally know the real meaning of the phrase 'Its me against the World!' Accept that God is with me!=)~


Will be back after my promos in about 11 days from now.. till then..Signing off!!=)